Why Most Transformations Fail: The Hidden Battle of Your Environment

We’ve all felt it—that fire when we decide this is it. We’re done with the old way of doing things. We’re making a change.

For the first few weeks, we’re unstoppable. Motivation is high. Every morning feels like a fresh start.

Then, something shifts.

Not overnight, but gradually.

The fire dims. The certainty wavers. The change that felt so right just a few weeks ago starts to feel… distant.

And before we know it, we’re back where we started.

Most people blame themselves. I wasn’t disciplined enough. Maybe I just didn’t want it badly enough.

But that’s not the real reason.

The real reason most transformations fail is simple: we stay in the same environment that created the old us.

Ever wonder why you can stick to a new routine for about 30 days but then it crumbles?

Here’s what happens:

When we start a transformation—whether it’s a career pivot, a mindset shift, or a lifestyle change—we do it with momentum. The excitement of something new. The novelty of taking action. The high of progress.

It’s the same reason New Year’s resolutions feel powerful at first but rarely make it past February.

In the beginning, we get an instant reward: the rush of feeling different.

✅ You start a new job? Exciting! So much to learn.
✅ You commit to a fitness plan? Every workout feels like proof you’re on track.
✅ You quit your job to pursue something new? Freedom never felt better.

But then?

The reinforcement fades. The environment we’re in doesn’t mirror our change.

And if our surroundings don’t reinforce our transformation, they slowly pull us back into who we used to be.

I recently spoke with someone who had quit their corporate job to focus on writing and shifting their research direction.

Six weeks in, they told me:
"I may start job searching again—just to keep my sanity."

Why? Did they lose interest in writing? Did their passion fade?

No.

They spent the holidays with people who kept asking:
"So… when are you going back to work?"
"Aren’t you worried about your career?"
"It must be nice to take a break, but what’s the plan?"

Day after day, these conversations chipped away at their resolve. Not because the questions were meant to harm, but because their environment hadn’t changed.

They were still surrounded by people who measured success through job titles, stability, and career progression.

Their transformation—writing, independent research, carving a different path—wasn’t reflected in the conversations around them.

And that’s the problem.

When the world around you doesn’t acknowledge or validate your change, your brain starts questioning it too.

Change is hard not because we lack motivation, but because we need constant reinforcement that we’re on the right track.

Humans are wired for feedback loops. We look for signals to confirm our choices:

🔄 If you start a new job and your colleagues respect you, that reinforces your decision.
🔄 If you train for a marathon and people cheer you on, you feel energized to keep going.
🔄 If you switch careers and your network supports your move, it affirms you made the right choice.

But what happens when you make a change and your environment doesn’t reflect it?

What happens when:
🚫 Your friend group still talks about stock prices daily, but you’ve shifted to building your own business?
🚫 Your LinkedIn feed is filled with ‘know-it-all’ experts, but their content no longer aligns with your path?
🚫 Your conversations still revolve around a life you’re trying to leave behind?

The absence of reinforcement makes the change feel like a mistake.

If your transformation is struggling, ask yourself:

Am I still surrounded by the old version of me?

Because if you are, your chances of sustaining change are low.

Instead, build a new environment that reflects the person you are becoming.

✔ Exit the spaces that don’t align with your transformation. (That friend group that only talks about things you no longer care about? It might be time to distance yourself.)
✔ Unfollow the voices that keep you tethered to your old identity. (You don’t need to keep consuming content from experts in an industry you’ve left.)
✔ Surround yourself with people who are also making a change. (Bonus: if they’re on the same path, you can hold each other accountable.)
✔ Create your own reinforcement signals—track progress, celebrate wins, talk about your transformation with those who get it.

Change isn’t just about discipline. It’s about designing a world that allows your new identity to exist.

If you don’t?

Your environment will pull you back.

If you do?

Your transformation won’t just survive—it will thrive.

Take a look at your surroundings.

Are they helping you become the person you want to be?

Or are they keeping you tied to the person you were?

Because the biggest threat to transformation isn’t failure.
It’s staying in a world where the new you has no place to grow.